I'll just paste my pastebin in here for anyone interested in playing.

Spike - Drabo/Dorabochan
Camilla - Camilla
Rudy - Kowaru
 
 
Y to attack, hold Y to throw hat. B to jump, A to use cards, Select opens the status screen, Start pauses, L and R cycle cards.
Tomato juice cards heal fully.
Strats are for JP version.
 
 
A note about exp, you have to wait until the enemy finishes blowing up to get it.
 
Game Path
 
FIGHTER ISLAND
 
mash Y
jump 15 logs
Hit 30 rocks, try and go for big ones for more exp
Jump on seesaw
hit 15 balloons with hat
Kill as many fish as you can on the raft. You can hit level 3 before this boss and that makes it cake
Beat up the cane boss
 
BATLAND
 
Get 100g from the butler
Try and jump and kill everything that walks across your path for the exp
Go to the castle door, killing cloves on the way until you hit level 3 if you didn't already
Run into the door and hit Y
Walk south to the bridge and the old man should call you about the key
Go left, kill the two cloves and talk to your pet
Go right twice and get the key and enter the castle
Go straight up and exit right
Go up to the balcony and head left into the moai head guy, he kicks you into the wall all the way to the right
Follow the room to a southern balcony and head left, jumping over spears
Jump onto the spring then continue left jumping over more spears. Enter the door
Head up then right, going past the armored feline, exit southeast in the next room
Proceed up the steps to the rafters, head left across the rafters.
Go down the steps and then right back up the steps to the left
Fight the big spider with hat tosses while avoiding its breath attacks. You can jump over them. You get healed after killing it so don't waste too much time dodging.
Head back across the rafters and back down stairs to pick up the key, then head right back up and go across them again
Open the locked door and head up.
Out on the balcony the rug is tossed in a rhythm, if you get caught you get thrown left
Jump over the carpet that the felines are tossing, it will shove you back left if you don't. Kill them at the end if you like they don't fight back
Head south to another balcony and then head right while jumping spikes, ignore the first door and enter the second for a key
Head back to the previous door and enter, while heading up and right until reaching the locked door.
Enter the door and head left then enter the open vent, head left when you can and try and go down left to fight the pull. head down and talk to spike's mom. She'll give you a transport card and heal your HP
Head left follow the winding path, head left at the southern corridor. In the hall with buzzsaws and a path up just stay against the lower wall. the upper path loops
At the next fork head up and left, right is a save guy
Follow the path until you're outside again and head right immediately. There is a key at the end of this path
Head back and up the steps, these catgirls don't move so they are easy kills if you need to try and hit level 4 still. Infact it's best to hit 4 around here to have full health for the upcoming boss. Beware of the bomb's second hit
Head right, dodging buzzsaws and arrows and enter the locked door and head up to fight Felina
 
FELINA - Firstly you need to hit level 4 to deal any real damage to her and to avoid taking 8 damage a hit from her rod and 4 touch.
She hops around the battle like a gymnist, but stops to attack and throw her staff at you. The main idea is to just be level 4 and jump attack right above her when she stops. Try and time your jumps to go over her scratcher swings as those hurt badly.
Once you get her to low health she will level up and fully heal, the same strategy works but now she will occasionally jump off screen and fly down trying to impale you. Jump before she hits the ground while moving to avoid damage.
Beating her lets you get 120g
 
After the cutscenes you'll be at the entrance to batland. You can go and shop if needed but need to talk to the butler to continue.
 
 
RATVILLE
 
Go left, left and more left. Up when you can't go left. Kill all of the cloves, cacti and try and get some coins on the way and you should hit level 5.
After a bit you'll be ambushed by some archers, after the scene you end up in a room with a passed out Camelia. In the bottom right is a tomato tree you can heal with
Head out of the cave and go left. kill some coins if you can and keep goin left. Now you get to do some platforming while some annoying ghosts try and push you. The ghosts can't die to melee attacks so you just need to move forward and try not to let them push you off the cliffs.
the 2nd to last jump screen has no ghosts, the next one you jump onto a red squidthing and it eventually dies and you fall down to the temple below
The building on the left is a card vender, on the right is Dowson. We're about to grind, save for the Lightning hat.
The first screen after the two stores has 3 dancing cacti and 3 cloves, wiping out the screen at level 5 is worth about 80exp. Do this until you hit level 6
After hitting 6 head north and encounter antlions. The antlions are the best exp for a while, the map with 4 being the fastest, grind until level 10. Pick up gold until you hit 800g then ignore it. You can ignore anything but 50s usually
 
CROC - At level 6 you deal enough damage to beat him but he hurts you badly. Before he levels just stay near the shield and jump and spin. If he does the purple shots from the shield then you are pretty safe and can almost kill him during that cycle.
After he levels he adds a new lightning bolt attack that hurts you if you're close. You can still jump and attack him from the shield side, since the lightning focuses on the spear side. Just watch out that shit hurts.
At level 10+ he dies in no time
After he dies he drops a few things randomly and the shield starts bouncing around, destroy the shield for another 100exp. Croc was worth 200
 
Head up the stairs and then go around the room, upstairs head around to the top right and go down the stairs, head around and ignore the mummies, keep doing so until a screen with slimes, then head out from the south. Hit level 7 off these slimes if you didnt hit 10+, you should be close after the coins on the way. Next boss is level 8
 
KALALA ROOT - Just keep jumping and attacking to the side of its mouth. When it sucks in for the lazer just move aside. Jump away from the arms if they come in close, jumping makes you jump over the leaves. Your damage will be a bit low, but this boss doesn't level up and heal.
At 10+ he dies in no time.
The root was worth 400exp, After the scenes we arrive in
 
 
VAMPARELLA
 
If you have 800g pick up the lightning Hat, if not go kill snow bunnies until you can buy it. At this point if you grinded to 10+ just jump and kill stuff in your way. We still need levels for the final area
Don't let the isometric view fool you, the path you have to take is pretty straight forward. Head right and up some steps twice and then head left a few maps and up a series of steps
Head right and you'll see a switch, hit it and then head into the cave. In the cave go across the bridge and head left, talk to the robed girl and exit left. head left and then down a bridge to exit the cave.
Outside head left and up the steps and into another cave (to the right is a save dude), inside is the entrance to the ice palace. this first room has 5 enemies worth 40 exp a pop who come right at you, kill them and level to 12 on them. Its faster to throw the lightning hat after moving up a bit and attacking. Roughly a minute over just caping. Should take 8-9 minutes to hit 12
Between now and Morey you need to hit 22k exp. Freezer is 1k but you still need another 5k. Killing most of the stuff between you and freezer is worth about 3k, but also time consuming. It might be best to grind up to 20k exp on the snowmen, but you can grind it out later just before the end
Head along the slippery path until Freezer drops down and attacks you. You can't do anything to him so just dodge and stay alive.
After he leaves exit the room to the left,  and follow the path a bit. The explosive guys and yukihimes are worth 80 exp each but taking damage causes either the frozen or burned animations on spike.
The room with yukihimes has two paths but they both go the same way. The upper path is faster. The next area has winding narrow paths but you just need to keep heading left.
Detailed - take the upper path from yukihimes, go down the steps and turn left follow the path and ignore the first conveyor belts, in the next room jump over the ice balls, they freeze you, in the next room ride the first and last conveyors and jump across the 2nd. After that just go left and up.
These ice guys in here give 100 exp each. in the next room go right, left is a deadend, head up and then upleft to reach a room with a save dude and 4 pitfalls.
Take the pitfall on the left to get the Soup card, you need this to damage freezer. They'll give you one for each time you talk to them but you should only need one unless you accidentally use it. After that jump down and head back around to the save room.
Once you're back, head into the hole on the right, dont worry you only fall in if you jump into it. Head right and then up to meet freezer.
 
FREEZER - You need to use the soup right away, and are hopefully 11 or more. Even at 11 you'll only do 2 damage a hit, but his attacks arent too dangerous. Just do the usual jump attacks and he should die in no time.
 
Afterward you end up back in a thawed Vamperalla. You might want to go ahead and buy some tomato juices for the final boss fight, as this is the last chance to buy anything. If you have an urge to use cards for some reason this is also your last shot. Talk to the butler to move on to
 
 
JUNGLE OF MAZES
 
Head up to see Camilla. She hurt her ankle so we get Rudy. This place is a maze and you have to go the right way in order to advance. The forest plays chimes when you go the right way. also ignore coins, there are no more shops.
Head Up, right, right, up, left, down, left, up. Then we arrive at the next boss
 
MORAY - At 12 it's about normal but he's still easy. Jump attack and try and time it to avoid his purple spit, that sticks you to the ground. When he hops twice stop moving because he'll center himself to you and extend his vines. If you stop he won't hurt you. Just start attacking once he's lined up again and you're good.
Unlike the last few bosses he actually does level up, but his only new attacks are sticking his eyes out and spinning some giant series of orbs around. Neither of which is an issue as he stands still to use them for you to unload
Moray is worth 3000 exp, that might push you to 13. Unlike Croc's shield those balls dont give any exp.
 
After the fight head back down and grind the cloves til 25k exp, keep going back to the morey map to respawn them so you dont reset the maze. After hitting level 13 about 7 rooms should put you over 25k. Then head up through the morey map
This time head left, up, right, up, up and you finally get to fight that chick from all the cutscenes.
 
ENDORA/HYDRA - She floats around and summons little fire dragon things to attack, but the usual jumpin and capin works to take her down. And then she levels and gets easier. She starts summoning tiny dragons while not doing much else. Just unload on her and ignore the dragons.
Endora is worth 10000 exp. This will likely make you level 14 if you weren't already. Head up to face the final boss.
 
OWARUSA/VON HESSLER - The first boss since Felina that's dangerous. His arm swipe hits pretty much all around him and stuns you, his flames make you take a burn animation, he teleports and he shoots orbs from his staff. You will want to throw your hat when far away and then start jumping and caping him, the damage will stack up quickly from both sources.
Once he's down to a sliver some ghost thing with an eye pops out and reveals it was possessing the dude, and then levels him up into a rape machine.
 
OWARUSA V2 - This guy just has a ton of attacks and most of them hurt. Luckily being on either side of the throne makes most of them miss you since they go downward.
your main worries are his homing balls and the touch damage. Blue orb goes across in a line and shoots freezing beams, red orb splits into 4 fireballs and travel down, usually followed by a line of fire that aims for you. Orange orb splits into two crescent blades that home on you and a third larger one that shoots straight down from him. Grey orb chases you and makes you fall into a hole, he can throw an axe down which comes back up at you and he can charge at you.
you can jump over everything but the charge. Now there's a common cheese method used in normal play of trapping him on one side of the throne while throwing your hat from the other.Each hat toss does about 2-3 cloves of damage to him and is relatively safe, and fast because of the damage. Should take about 3 minutes
What you can try to do is throw your hat and constantly jump attack next to him. You will take a lot of damage, if you get below two whole bars use a tomato juice card. This issue with this is most of his attacks stun, freeze or burn you and you have little chance to react. this is way slower takes about 5 minutes
 
Now you have to chase Dark, but control is taken away as soon as you exit the bottom of the screen but there are text boxes a bit after you have to advance. Stop time after exiting the throne room